Neither

“But I don’t. I don’t want either of these plans. Neither of them will work.” Earl didn’t raise his voice. It remained steady. Several of the men in the room assumed this meant that he wasn’t firm. Their approach was to raise their voices in order to sound more determined.

“We have a tie vote,” said Gerald again. “That gives you a duty to cast the deciding vote.”

“I vote ‘no’,” Earl stated to a round of angry voices from the room.

“The problem,” said Manfred in a louder voice, “is that you don’t have the courage of your convictions. You aren’t willing to be counted on either side. You don’t want to have to explain your choice to your opponents. What you’re missing is that both sides are going to be going after you for being so wishy-washy, for not taking a stand!”

“The problem,” Earl replied in the same tone, “is not that I don’t have the courage of my convictions, it’s that I don’t have the courage of yours. I do not support either plan.”

“But surely you can decide that one plan is better than the either. Show some courage! Make a choice!” Gerald was sounding a bit desperate.

“This controversy has been tearing our church apart for months now. How much money should we spend on facilities for the youth? How much on caring for the elderly? How much on outreach? It has been hard to pray or meditate anywhere in the church, because someone is always advocating for some part of one plan or the other.

“You say that I don’t have the courage of my convictions. I’m standing for my convictions right now. I have tried to say these things before, but I have been ignored. The assumption has always been that we’d either go with a more traditional view of ministry in our church, or with a more modern, forward-looking ministry.

“But I’m wondering what God wants. I’m wondering what mission we’re pursuing with either of these plans. Both plans maintain the grounds and the building. Both plans take care of social needs, proportioned for different groups of people, but still largely social.

“I have tried to say this gently. I came here assuming I wouldn’t get the opportunity, but God has provided me the opportunity with this deadlock.

“I don’t see God in either plan. I have heard prayers, all asking God to bless what we planned. What I ave not seen was any effort to understand and plan for a mission for the church. These plans look inward. They focus differently, but they look inward.

“Even more importantly, each plan ignores the needs of the advocates of the other. You’re all looking to beat the other side and get your vision of the church implemented. You’ve said anyone who disagrees can just get with the program or leave.

“I would only vote for a plan if it was one that considered everyone’s needs, everyone’s desires, and then took these to the Lord to see what we should do to honor God. Then I would vote for a plan.

“You may think I should have said more earlier, but none of you were listening. I did say these things, but you just assumed I’d go along. And that’s how it would have worked out. But God gave me the gift of a tie vote. I consider it a miracle.

“Now you all have an opportunity to look at these factions in the body and decide to be one Body of Christ, serving God in this neighborhood. I’ll vote for such a plan. But it won’t matter. If you find such a plan you’ll hardly need to hold a meeting to decide. You can just hold a praise meeting thanking God for his gift of vision!”

“You’re just a faction of one! You’re trying to destroy the church!” Gerald shouted. He pounded his fist on the table since he didn’t have a gavel.

“I wonder if it might work,” said Ruth, one of the active servants in the congregation. She didn’t manage to get anything more out before chaos broke out, and nobody could hear.

Thought question: What would you do next?