I’m Just the Enforcer

“Because you failed to get a proper license for your stand, I have to cite you for operating it without a license,” said the official. He looked like his name could be “Official,” wearing a suit like a uniform and radiating precision.

“OK, so what’s the fine for that, and where can I get a license?” asked the young merchant.

“You would get a license from me.”

“OK, but what’s the fine, and how much does the license cost?”

“Oh, the fine is $200 per day, and the license costs $10 per day.”

“So if I can pay you $1400, and then $10 per day, I’ll be OK?”

“Well, no, you cannot purchase a license within 30 days of having been cited for not having one.”

“So I pay you $1400 and then wait 30 days to get a license and open a stand again?”

“Well, no. Once your stand has been in place for a week, which it has, you are required to give 2 full days notice before you shut it down.”

“So I’d have to pay the fine for nine days, and then shut my stand down, wait 30 days, and buy a license?”

“Well, no, once I’ve cited you for failing to get a license, and for operating without a license for a week, you can’t continue to operate. I’d have to cite you for that too. For that, the penalty is 30 days in jail.”

“And what is the penalty for failing to give two days’ notice before shutting down?”

“That’s from 30 to 90 days, depending on whether the violation is deliberate. And yours would be deliberate, because I just told you about the law, so if you stay here now, it will be a deliberate violation, and you’d certainly be sentenced to 90 days in jail.”

“So what should I do?”

“You should have found out about the law before you set up your stand.”

“But I didn’t know there were such complicated and contradictory laws!”

“Show some respect! I can also cite you for showing disrespect to our laws.”

“But isn’t there a way out?”

“A way out of the law?” The official looked scandalized. “Put your hands up on the back of your head.”

The merchant complied, but continued to complain. “But this doesn’t make any sense. There’s no way out, even paying a penalty.”

“That’s not my problem,” said the official. “I’m just the enforcer.”

(Featured image generated by Jetpack AI.)